The (First) Rain

Pluviophile (n): A lover of rain; someone who finds joy and peace of mind during rainy days

Why, yes! I'm a pluviophile.

Summer's already here. No? Well, it sure feels to me like it is because I'm already feeling as sweaty as I do every summer. But, you know, not today… today has been different. From the moment I woke up this morning, all I can think and feel is… Rain! And strangely, because of my constant thoughts about rain, it feels like it is cloudy, breezy and dewy since morning here. (Even though it is not)

Okay now, tell me how many of you like the rain? How many of you love the smell of wet earth? Who loves a hot chai, plate full of mom-made pakoras and a nice 'window view' to gaze upon those beautiful little rain drops on a rainy evening? I know. The answer would be most of you. Well, I love the rain too; however, I love it in my own different way. For instance, I wonder how many of you'd be willing to take a walk under the rain rather than look for cover or use an umbrella. Um, I don't look for cover most days and rather than sitting and eating pakoras, I'd give anything to take a stroll outside in the rain with my close ones (if they are willing to, that is). Else, I imagine myself stand in the balcony of the top floor or terrace of the building with them under an umbrella and just... talk... talk about anything and everything.

Uh, with February 14th just around the corner, you think thoughts like this are meant to crop up in your humble but single narrator's morbidly confused brain, eh? Ah, yes, I am eagerly waiting for the 14th of February, my friend. But it has nothing to do with the Valentine's Day. Instead, my wait is for the return of 'The Walking Dead' Season 6. (Oh, yes! I love that show! And after what happened so far this season, I just cannot wait any longer). Alright, clearly, I am not as romantic as you think I am. Now that we have established that let's continue with what we were discussing here. You must have figured it by now that this post of mine is about 'Rain', eh? Yes, but it is not about any rain. It is only about those 'firsts' that I am obsessed so much about.

The idea to write this blog post popped on a rainy evening, in late August of 2014, while we were driving home after a misadventure. It was raining cats and dogs then and the next song to play on the radio was "Sathiya" from the movie 'Love' and just then... I was spellbound for I looked at those rain drops rolling down the window. I watched those droplets roll down, every time hoping that they would meet, become one, down the line. Some did, while most did not. Every time the drops conjoined, I had a smile on my face. People do this, right? Look at drops dripping down glass windows and think of things... Some like to think that the drops are racing against each other and want to witness which one won while some try to find shapes in those drops, by connecting those rain drops. But I… that night, I just wanted to see those drops unify. I couldn't care less as to who won or what shape they formed. I just wanted them to become one. And when I witnessed them do that, it was beautiful, you know. Every time I saw two drops intersect and become one that night, I wondered if anyone has ever written about something so beautiful (Somebody should have). If not then I'd decided that I would take it up to myself to write something about 'Rain' (Just to satisfy my urge, you see. Let me apologize upfront if this turns out to be a disappointing write up). It is amazing how, sometimes, such small things show you how beautiful life is or can be.

So, here's a picture of the night where it all started.

#3 - A walk under her umbrella

24th December, 2014 – It must have been like any other boring weekday at Phoenix Market City mall (Chennai) for most people… but it wasn't like that for a boy and a girl. This girl, (let's call her 'Cry baby' for convenience sake ;), going forward) and I had decided to meet on 24^th December 2014, here, at Phoenix Market City mall! This was the first time we were going to meet. So, I hoped it to be nothing less than magical. Was it, you ask?! I am getting there.

"I think for the most part if you're really honest with yourself about what you want out of life, life gives it to you" :)

We both were pen-friends (initially). We used to write to each other every day, talk to each other on calls for hours at nights (later) but we never got around meeting each other. Funny thing is, during our initial conversations, I had told her (on multiple occasions) that it would rain when we'd meet for the first time. Yes, I was the dreamy one while she was a realist (read that boring). When asked to imagine how mesmerizing it would be walking together in the rain on our first meet, she'd quickly dismiss me by smiling it off, always. She, once, teased me saying that it was summer then, so I can dream as much as I want but it will not rain and our first meet would not be as movie-like as I was dreaming it to be. And just like she said, that's exactly how things turned out to be on our first date. It had been hot and sunny, all day long!

It was 06:05pm then and we were planning on calling it a day for I had to catch my return bus to Hyderabad while she… she had to reach home before mom-dad could suspect that something's fishy with their beloved daughter. So, we took the escalator downstairs after our movie and late-lunch. When we got out of the mall we were amazed to see how the weather had changed. I looked at her and told that it might rain. She smiled and reminded me that we were leaving already. "It's far-fetched", she said, while walking on the pathway outside the mall leading us outside to the Rickshaw stand. Just then a rain drop fell on my arm. It is here when the magic began!

Soon, it turned into a pitter-patter leaving our beloved cry-baby no option but to take her tiny, pink umbrella out of her handbag. Yes, even after repeatedly asking her not to, she did (Somehow I am never able to control people – Maddy might disagree with that because I always get my way when I'm with him). People ran for cover outside and umbrellas were opened as the rainfall became heavier while I stood there smiling, looking at her. I had my usual 'I-told-you-so' look on my face with the widest grin possible. She nodded her head with a smile, held my hand and asked me if we could spare time for a walk around the mall. My face lit up like the Christmas tree. "Without the umbrella?", I asked surprised. She couldn't do that because it would only raise a series of suspecting questions from her mom-dad. So, I had to be content with what "little" I got. In fact, all I wanted was for it to rain at our first meet. Now that it was happening and we were both walking together under the same umbrella while she held my hand softly, I could not ask for more. I could not bother about anything else. (You know, I am usually the guy who is awkward when it comes to holding hands and so, I was doing my usual thing of being awkward. But eventually, I couldn't care any lesser about what people around us thought about us). Heck! I could not even smell the petrichor emanating from the dry soil that evening. We were both lost. Thanks to those little droplets of rain continuously falling, the roofs of the cars were drumming. And all I could hear was, those droplets on the roofs of the car fade into a musical chime. My arm on one side of the umbrella was getting drenched along with my backpack that I was carrying. She was trying hard to accommodate both of us under her umbrella. But I wasn't. I couldn't care about anything in the world. I just wanted it to rain. I wanted the time to just take a pause. And quite frankly, it did feel like 'Time' had stopped that evening but the rain... oh, no! It just couldn't. It felt like it was raining just for us, just because I had dreamt of it for all those years :) However, like all the good things in life, eventually, the rain stopped too but only after turning those beautiful 20 minutes of our lives into an unforgettable memory to cherish forever.

#2 - Dancing in the Rain!

Rain is like kryptonite for any biker - As much as I love rain, even for me, it is. A word of advice, if someone says that he is not scared of riding in the rain then chances are, more often than not, that he is a liar and a show-off who might learn about his fears quite soon, the hard way. In all these years, I have never seen, read or heard of any biker who goes "Yay! It's raining!" when they see a downpour from the window on the morning of a ride. Deep down every biker is the same and most of us are skeptical of a ride in the rain, having said that, I do not intend to claim that one can/do not enjoy riding in rain. In fact, it is one of the best ways to enjoy motorcycling, undoubtedly. However, amidst all the enjoyment, there is still a scared, cautious nerd, within every biker, somewhere deep, who keeps calculating their every move. So, you might ask how is it that someone can enjoy something while also being worried, deep down, about it, eh? Well, I have learnt that apparently, you can do that.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain."

May 17th 2011 & 26th July 2015

Back in 2011, Maddy and I were returning from our first road trip (Pune to Hyderabad, this time) on his (then) one-month-old Royal Enfield Thunderbird 350 (the first long-ride of his bike). It had been a very hot, long and boring day of ride (until then) because most roads in the state of Maharashtra were not as good as we've expected – Renovation and diversions everywhere. However, after just entering Andhra Pradesh-Karnataka border, things changed! The weather had become pleasant and even before we could realize, it started to rain… heavily. Similarly, in July, 2015 – It rained consistently for about 40-50kms while we were returning on our KTM RC 390 (first long-ride on it) which was an approximately 300kms ride (one way).

On both the occasions, we did not expect it to rain and were completely unprepared for it (On RE Thunderbird we even had luggage with us). However, for some strange reason, on both these instances we rode into the rain without any second thoughts. Um, sometimes, caring reader, even though you know that doing a certain thing is a mistake… you just go ahead and do it anyway. It was just one of those days. :)

Let me tell you, gentle reader, riding in the rain is… well, definitely not always fun. I mean, we have both ridden countless times in the rain. But, riding on the highways in rain is a whole different ball game. Picture this – your brother's riding at speeds of 90-100kmph (!) in the rain while you sit tight with a fake smile as if you don't really care but, in reality, you are shit scared for your life while he is having fun. Every time a car passes you… honking, your fake smile fades a little no matter how hard you try to keep it intact. Now, the worst are the trucks! Every time a truck passes you, the greasy, oily and muddy water from its tires splash out right onto your face and sometimes even into your mouth (Especially, when you try to yell at your brother to slow down. Every freaking time! So, an advice here – Just shut up when something huge passes you closely in the rain. Or, better yet, get a pillion rider helmet!)

But, no matter how painful, distracted or disgusted it leaves you; I bet you will always have that grin on your face when droplets of water drip down your nose or when you listen to the sound of the rain-drops falling on your helmet (Well, eventually, you will end up listening to these rain drops rather than those car horns). Every rain drop might hit you like a tiny metal ball. They might hit you, tak! Takk! They might turn it into a nightmare when it comes to visibility. Sometimes, you are even drenched from head to toe, with strong cold breeze constantly hitting you while cold rain-water seeps its way into your tee-shirt, onto your body and even into your shoes. But, in my humble opinion, even after all this, you will still be able to smile… forgetting all your woes (doesn't really matter if it is for a very brief instant) and you have to understand that this moment, this smile that you have, are proof enough that you have been liberated. Perhaps, only for the briefest of moments may be, but you did. You might not experience such a smile very often in your life, dear reader, so I suggest you enjoy it the most while you can. I for one will cherish these memories for a long really long time.

[A word to the budding bikers (if any reading): In retrospect, if you have the proper gear with you to ride in the rain and if you get your basics right, it is perhaps one of the best things one can ever experience. Alas, we did not have any rain gear to protect us during those two rides. I sincerely suggest you to experience this one but make sure you do that with the gear on to enjoy that feeling even more]

Those interested, stay tuned to this space for the #1. Until then take care!

See you on the other side,

K

The Killing Joke

Despite having tons of tasks laying around for me to do at work, and having constant updates circulating all over the internet from the Auto Expo 2016, which I had been waiting (read that dying) to read about, and even after having a yummy team lunch to attend to - All I want to do now (and been wanting to do all this week) is... just write. Write pages and pages about... Aarrghhh!! This freakin' mosquito is driving me crazy!

I have no clue how he (yes, the mosquito) is doing it but he is hiding himself on the black shade of my desktop monitor, or at times beneath, where the handle is fixed to hold the monitor. Sometimes, he hides amidst those black colored cables spread all over, in the corner of the desk, behind the monitor. Damn! Those camouflage skills! And sometimes, he is not even scared, he is flying right in the middle of my view of the monitor; It is so frustrating when he is resting on my arm! And even worse, when I am engaged, writing something so beautiful (to me)… he's, out of nowhere, biting me and frenziedly feasting on my blood! Every single time!! God! I hate you, Mr. Mosquito! (And I wonder who's taking care of housekeeping at my work place. So much for hygiene! And I also wonder how this lonely, poor fellow snuck in)

Okay, now, you must be wondering, "You could just kill it, you know?" Correct? Well, I have always had this problem – I cannot kill a mosquito with my bare hands. I have never. You know, when my sister – who, by the way, enjoys hunting them every dark night – gives me that stare, I tend to act as if I am trying to kill one and missed. It is very difficult to put that act for her because sometimes I, accidentally, don't miss. They fly so much! I just cannot stand it when its blood spills on my hands or fingers. Eeww!

Did you just call me a 'wuss' mentally, now? How dare you, huh! You know, this is exactly what sets Batman apart. With all those deadly weapons and gadgets available at his fingertips, with Ninja-like abilities and training, with those highly skilled moves that help him kick asses of a whole mob, all at once, single handedly and then vanish like a shadow in the dark, with so much strength and resources in his possession… he never kills (At least, tries his best not to). It's his sense of justice that does not let him. He always remains true to his code of honor. And so do I. :) (Amazed how I just compared myself to the Batman, again? Silly reader, just wait and read along)

But, God, this mosquito! He reminds me so much of Heath Ledger's Joker from the Dark Knight! (Yep, dear reader, now is the time you should really be amazed for I just compared Mr. Mosquito to Heath's iconic 'Joker' :P). It is as if we both are communicating. He has no fear of me whatsoever, instead it's as if he is enjoying every bit teasing me. Frustrating me by not letting me complete what I have been wanting to write for so many days. Tempting me to break my code. Pushing me to kill him! It's like he is saying things to me in Heath's voice: 

Mr. Mosquito:   Ah-ta-ta-ta-ta! [resting on my arm] You have nothing, nothing to threaten me with. Nothing to do with all your strength.

Me:                     [Moving my arm slightly] Leave me alone.

Mr. Mosquito:  Killing is making a choice. [still on my arm, like he's immovable]

Me:                     [Waving my arm frantically in the air] Leave. ME. ALONE!

Mr. Mosquito: [Now, flying right in front of my screen] Come on, I want you to do it, I want you to do it. Come on, hit me. *Hit me!*

Me:                     You're garbage who kills for blood.

Mr. Mosquito:  Don't talk like one of them. You're not! Even if you'd like to be. To them, you're just a freak, like me! You see, these morals, these codes, they're a bad joke. Dropped at the first sign of trouble. They're only as good as the world allows them to be. See, I'm not a monster. I'm just ahead of the curve.

This is exactly what one of our telepathic conversations would have seemed like, I think. I don't know if it is just mere stupidity of Mr. Mosquito or just simply laziness that he does not fly away from me even when I am moving my arm or snap at him with my fingers. Feels like he has been just here all day long. I have pushed him off on several occasions yet he is coming back! Why can't I just kill him, Lord! Oh my God, he is back again now!

Mr. Mosquito: Oh, you. You just couldn't let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You truly are incorruptible, aren't you? You won't kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won't leave you because you're just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever.

Me:                    Well, if you have snuck into this huge building, all alone, just to suck my blood. Then just get it over with! Don't kill me like this!

Mr. Mosquito: [giggling] I don't, I don't want to kill you! What would I do without you? Go back to sucking those mere, juicy, sweet beings with no fight in them? No, no, NO! No. You... you... complete me.
 

Okay, that's it now! I have officially run out of patience! Let me make an exception this one time and kill this joke!

Until then, take care, gentle reader. (And pray for me that I come out victorious out of this)

See you on the other side,
K

 

 

 

The Synergy

Okay, I know, I know. Just a glance at the title of this blog post and most of you must be wondering what is wrong with me, why can't I decide on the theme and stick to making this blog what it actually is all about. Right? You must be wanting to know what this blog is - Is it about a guy who is trying too hard to be noticed as a biker?! Is it about his "travels" or the series of misadventures that follow?! Is it about a guy who often boasts of his "writing abilities" but seldom exhibits them?! (Okay, this one, it is!). Or is it simply, all about a cracked whacko's bizarre, idiotic thoughts which he shares online for the entire world to view but never really does anything (the meaningful ones, I refer to) about them?! Well, uh, I cannot tell you what this blog 'is' or 'will be' because I don't know it myself, I haven't decided on that just yet. And clearly, I don't want to label it. I cannot tell you what it 'is' or what it 'will be' but what I can tell you is; what it 'is not' or what it 'will not be'. Um, this blog is not just about showing what an avid biker I am, it isn't just about my bike or my love for automobiles. Neither is it about my bike rides & road trips nor about my rants about them. This blog is not just about my moronic, meaningless, narcissistic thoughts, or my confusion, you know. This blog is not just about me or my world, sometimes. Oh, it isn't a travelogue alone. It, most definitely, isn't a way that I use to impress girls (Kind of hard to convey the tone over here and I… find it to be a daunting task to impress people even when I am able to do that). It isn't limited to just any of these things. It is, for me, much more beyond that. It is, in a way, a place for me to be 'me', say anything I want to say - even stupid, mean, silly, senseless, embarrassing things that I usually don't get to say out loud in my real world. 

So, to set the record straight – If you think I am the "usual" - tattooed, leather wearing, knee-scraping biker that you've seen on the roads or read about online then let me clarify, I am not. I am an average guy who'd usually go unnoticed even when standing right in front of you in a crowd, who just happens to like riding a motor-bike. I don’t ride to those coffee places on Saturday mornings, shop for biking gears at the first chance I get or spend my time fixing my bike on the weekends, just so you know (I mean no offense to those who enjoy doing all that). Instead I'd love to spend my weekends with my family, talk to them, go watch a movie with friends/family, go out on brunches or late night dinners. (Lately, I have been spending my entire weekends with our cutie pie Avvy'lu. I'm really sad that he is growing up so quickly and thus want to make the most of this time. Lord, why can't you let him be 10 months old forever!). So, I am just a different kind of biker or traveller. And my love for automobiles and long drives has a limit, unlike my blog's limitations. So, I will not spend all my time here talking about just my travel stories, road trips or just about bikes and cars, in general. These will, undoubtedly, be some of the many topics that I will write about because I usually like to talk about these things. I could talk on and on about video games, movies, documentaries and sitcoms too, so I might write some posts on those lines, some times. Also, I have a wild imagination and crazy, unstoppable stream of thoughts, so every now and then, I might pen them down here. As much as I like to write about my travels, I also cherish writing about my super weird (sometimes) thoughts. And unfortunately (for you), today is one such day! (Yay!! Look at how thrilled you are! >:-( )

Did it ever occur to you that even though you are this elegant, sophisticated yet sweet and nice person from the outside, there is a slight chance that you could be this person who is not 'good' on the inside... or in reality, a total whack-job just waiting for you to discover? Ever felt like you are a crazy, mean jackass?! I did. It could be because of anything, you know, like a simple thought which could bring out something different from within you. For instance, while riding your bike slowly, you look at some random bald guy on the road walking alone while on the phone, on the sidewalk, and you immediately think - "Hey, what if I just slap on the back of his head and ride away?", Or if there is some elderly man in front of you on the escalator and the thought that you could push him and in turn hurt him might cross your mind. Um, thoughts like this did cross your mind, now, didn't they? Or is it just me?! Well, if they did then do not worry, because having such thoughts do not mean that we are bad persons, in fact they mean that we are normal, I guess. Uh-uh, let me correct myself -  Thoughts, by themselves, are harmless. Even though they are bizarre or even seemingly dangerous, at times, they are just thoughts. So, having such thoughts do not make us bad, it's the synergy of 'thoughts' and 'action' that decides if we are normal or abnormal. It is only our action of these crazy thoughts that will make us bad people. (May be this is what Rachel meant when she uttered this line to Bruce Wayne - "It is not who you are underneath, it is what you do that defines you.")

Now a few days ago, a weird thought had crossed my mind - I was alone in the car, driving and listening to my playlist, but suddenly after the music stopped, somehow this other song popped in my head - 'Kaiyil Mithakkum' from the movie 'Ratchagan', a tamil song which I haven't heard in more than 6 years, and which by the way, I have no clue of what it means. As a matter of fact, I had heard and watched this song only once in my entire life and that was 6 years ago (Thanks to my curiosity that night). It was sung (sort of) to me by this girl on the phone, she knew it in Tamil and since I do not know Tamil, she basically just hummed it for me. It was the first time I heard her sing (hum) and just like that it stuck with me forever! (Yes, she was that good). I had a big time crush on this girl, BIG TIME! So, naturally, I still think about her, sometimes. And may be because of that... a crazy thought crossed my mind then - I immediately wanted to speak to her, meet her and... just like that, suddenly, I found myself wanting her all to myself, selfishly! It was a horrible thing to think because she is now happily settled with someone out there. Even if she is not, that isn't the right thing to do. Now, this thought here may be harmless. But had I acted on it then may be I would have been the bad guy, a home wrecker, in this case.

Oh, come on! You still think I am a bad guy for having such thoughts? I confessed (well, sort of) that I am ashamed and was confused then. And just so you know, having just the thought is not as bad as doing the deed. Also for your information, according to psychologists, most new mothers, at some point, have thoughts about dropping, hurting or drowning their babies (intentionally). It does not mean that they are dangerous. It means that they are looking out for possible dangers to protect the newborns from (or at least that's what the psychologists say). In my case, that thought must have come up because of me. My urge to stop my thoughts, counter-intuitively, make it pop more often. Thought suppression, clearly, does not work because I tend to remember what I am not supposed to think about. You think that is easy? Okay, try not to think about having gum in your hair now - Ah ha! See! You just thought about it.

Our bizarre thoughts aren't the indicators of who we are or what we will likely do. I mean, sure, I am scared and think that I am a dangerous, crazy, jackass when thoughts like these cross my mind or when thoughts like ramming someone with a car (GTA-style) pops in my head. It is a strange thing to think of but I, for sure, know that I am not going to hurt someone (at least not intentionally). I know that I have to avoid the synergy. And I always do. :)

So, next time your brain pops something like this into your head, remember that it is perfectly normal (Think of me, because I survive this everyday). Sit back and take a deep breath (And don't forget to exhale later).

See you on the other side,
K